Polydactica

  Dissociation vs. Feelings of Reality I just returned to my cozy shed from a short(ish) shirtless walk. (the walk was about 1.5 miles or so). I walked along the train tracks, went to the park, which was empty aside from a couple of parked RVs, and swung on a large, shell-shaped swing. I watched the rope teeter back and forth until I eventually felt motion sick, then I left. I ended up walking downtown, where there were two other shirtless dudes (yay! I wasn't alone). Anyways, why am I writing this? Today I feel especially collected. Too often when I am maneuvering through life, I feel almost as if I'm in a quasi-fugue state. It's a surreal feeling of unreality that I don't like, and in fact actively despise. However, today the world felt real. I felt grounded. I felt sane. Everything was coherent, and I was "in the moment," so to speak. I had some interesting thoughts while walking, but they mostly all fizzled out; like clouds passing me by. I ought to buy a